Last week, The Washington Post published an article about Karen Pence, wife of Vice-President Mike Pence. You can read the very interesting article, written by Ashley Parker, by clicking on this link.
The article describes the important role Mrs. Pence plays in her husband’s life. Although it contains 1931 words, this single sentence of 33 words has created the most reaction to the article.
“In 2002, Mike Pence told the Hill that he never eats alone with a woman other than his wife and that he won’t attend events featuring alcohol without her by his side, either.”
Social Media buzzed with negative reactions to Mike Pence’s personal practice that he feels is important to protect his marriage. Characterizations of Pence’s dining policy ranged from “prudishness” to claims it limits opportunities for women to work on his staff. While some of the comments demonstrate well-meaning thoughtful observation, others display mean-spirited personal attacks by political opponents.
Why Would Anyone Oppose Protecting Marriage?
How could anyone fault a man for going to great lengths to avoid the appearance of impropriety with a woman? I can think of a few reasons.
1. People who do not share our Christian faith do not share our values.
The secular world holds a loose view of marriage and sexuality. We live in a culture that places no restraint on sexuality. Our culture celebrates and encourages pre-marital and extramarital sexual activity. The Bible considers sex sacred and reserves it for a monogamous, heterosexual marriage.
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One of the most often quoted statistics is that the divorce rate for Christians is roughly the same as for non-christians. This statistic is simply not true. A Gospel Coalition “fact check” article reports that data indicates practicing, conservative Christian families feature a lower divorce rate. You can read that article at this link.
Clearly, our secular culture has different views about the sacredness of marriage.
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2. People who do not share our Christian faith do not understand our values.
Comparing the “spiritual” person to the “natural” person, Paul observes that much of what we believe is incomprehensible to others. Our values require spiritual discernment only available to those who, by faith, tune in to the Holy Spirit. (1 Corinthians 2:12-14)
3. People who do not share our Christian faith hate our values.
While our secular culture calls for tolerance, it certainly does not demonstrate tolerance toward our Christian values. Rather than indifference, our culture reacts with vitriol toward our moral stands.
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Jesus warned us that would be the case.
“If the world hates you, understand that it hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own. However, because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of it, the world hates you.” – John 15:18-19
So what can we do in response?
1. Hold a high view of marriage fidelity. The marriage relationship is important for many reasons. One of the most important reasons is that it reflects the relationship of Jesus to His Bride, the Church. We cannot let our culture shape our values. (Romans 12:2)
2. Celebrate those who show leadership by example. We should hold up Mike and Karen Pence as examples of how couples can maintain accountability to one another.
3. Share redemptive love with those who have experienced failure. If we truly value the sanctity of marriage, it should hurt us when we see marriages fail. Rather than judging and ostracizing those who are hurting, we can show them compassion, love, and support. One way we ascribe value to something is to genuinely hurt when that value suffers.
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4. Place safeguards over our own marriages. Years ago, Jerry Jenkins wrote a most helpful book entitled Hedges: Loving Your Marriage Enough to Protect It. Jenkins includes a number of marriage saving practices that we would all do well to employ. You can order the book by clicking here.
Kudos to Mike and Karen Pence. May their tribe increase. And, may I always be found in the marriage protecting tribe. I love my wife and my Lord so much, that I want no less.
For discussion
Click the comment tab and answer these questions:
- What do you think of Mike Pence’s practice to never eat alone with a woman other than His wife?
- What are some marriage protecting practices you employ?